Be the Sailor of Your Own Ship: Stop Taking Directions from Others
The picture on the right is taken in Vietnam on a boat tour; the one on the right is taken in Xi’an, China – I love the round doorways…
Our first encounter with the boundaries
Right from our early childhood days, we have been under the influence of some "things" and some "people." As newborns, we were under the guidance of our parents and grandparents; when we started making sense of the external world, we came under the influence of rules, systems, logic, and senses.
In teenage life, we become part of society and our mindset makes the shift to how we can be the most loved, widely accepted, and highly admirable personality in the crowd. Moving on to the next step in the ladder of life, we get into jobs where the pressure of social acceptance multiplies exponentially and we start running from pillar to post with the hope of making some of the finest impressions in the world, that probably no one has ever made (at least we tend to think like that).
As life progresses and we get involved in relationships, there come the struggles of adjustments, compromises, and sacrifice. It’s not that each and every relationship comes with burdens and baggage, however, all relationships require being sensitive towards others, being cognizant about others’ needs and requirements, and respecting each other’s boundaries. With these emotional necessities come expectations and most of us meet them or at least try our best to meet them.
Life moves on and we become parents! All our mistakes and errors made in our formative years spring into life right in front of our eyes, and we get worked up to make our children the brightest prodigy in the whole of the neighborhood. Be it the journals of unique parenting techniques or the suggestion from your colleague, whose daughter is achieving phenomenal marks at a very young age – you just want your child to be like her.
it's time to discover your passion
Your children grow up and probably do not become as famous as Einstein, Musk, or Buffet, and in your old age, you wonder what the point of it all was!
What was the point of following everybody starting right from your first day on earth? You wanted to ride the bike like John, who you considered to be the best rider. However, now after three scores years and ten, John is not a professional racer and has never been. In college, you wanted to be as dashing and cool as Mark; however, now you know that at seventy, Mark has not led a good and disciplined life.
You wanted to be as successful as your colleague Elisa, but never figured out where you lacked your passion. Therefore, as a septuagenarian, you are leading an average life but Elisa is worth a billion dollars! You wanted your children to be the next Wall Street entrepreneur who has made it big, however, even after trying for an entire life, you could not make them choose science over the arts.
You wonder how different it could have been, if you never followed anybody and just listened to yourself – be it your passion, your career, or in your relationships.
The truth is, if you had listened to your heart, instead of falling in line and getting led by others, you would have at least got the life of your son who is happy in his arts and not unsatisfied and unfulfilled with a bunch of ‘could have been’ in his heart!
Find your own way
This might not be your life story, however, the chances are, that a lot of our parents and relatives have led this kind of life, and today, most people of this generation are still continuing to lead a life, that is highly influenced by others.
If you always wanted to be the coolest person, the most admired individual, and a highly successful business owner with unique solutions, why on earth were you deaf to all this, to your intrinsic talents, strengths, and potential?
Why did you ever want to be like that other guy who lacks your immense abilities and capabilities that are highly eccentric? The truth is that we cannot be unique by following others, we cannot be special by being average like others, we cannot achieve extraordinary feats if we are influenced by common and ordinary ideas, and we cannot leave a mark on our own on this planet, if we surrender our individuality and become like just others.
The flip side to this sheepish life is filled with perks, unbelievable achievements, huge benefits, legendary status, and ultimately an eternal satisfaction that cannot be felt or experienced until and unless you have realized your own drives, desires, and goals.
The compass of your life should be solely controlled by you and no one other than you should be the sailor of your destination. When you rely on your decisions, on your life choices, on your gut instincts and intuition, life might surprise you pleasantly, however, it will never leave you discontent.
This is because, when you travel on your chosen path, the obstacles you encounter become your responsibility and you have no one to shed the blame upon or point the fingers at. You know for yourself how to deal with the impending hurdle and how rewarding will be the experience when you reach the other side.
It’s all for you, initiated by you, and done because of you!
Don’t let people discourage you from living your dreams.
On the other hand, when you step into somebody else’s shoes and decide to travel on their chosen path, every obstacle that comes your way drains your motivation and drive, because you know deep down that overcoming this obstacle will ultimately satisfy the person whose path you are actually traveling.
It won’t give you any long-term satisfaction, joy, or fulfillment and soon you will realize that time has passed by, the scenarios have changed, and you still remain a pawn waiting to take orders from someone else.
When you do things for yourself, without caring what others say, think, or judge, you become the master of your own world. You get to define your destination, choose your path, and dictate the terms. You need not rely on others' guidance as, chances are that, those guidelines are more beneficial for them and not you!
So, why do you bother to invest in someone else’s dreams, when you have your own imagination, vision, and creativity?
How would you know you can trust your own instincts, and intuition, and respond to your inner calling? Or how do you define your passion and be sure that you will receive the right guidance from your inner self?
The way is in front of you
Well…you can turn to Hypnosis for the answers…
Hypnosis is a powerful tool that has been specifically designed and developed for your inner engineering. The sole objective of this tool is to unwind you from within and de-clutter your mind that is laden with preconceived notions, external judgments, and societal obligations.
Hypnosis can help you cut the fuss that is stopping you from communicating with your inner self. If there is ever a single person on this planet who can be your best guide, friend, and philosopher, it is you and no one other than you. Hypnosis not only helps you understand this, it empowers you to be in the driver’s seat for your own destination.
When you get to see yourself in the clear light of the day and examine your strengths, skill, and potential, you do not need society to tell you what you are good at and where you lack perfection. Even the areas that need work, will blossom right in front of your eyes, so that you can be better at those specific things. This is the magic of Hypnosis.
If you have a master blueprint of your life in the palm of your hands, you do not need to look at others for direction!
Remember, you can leave others for your own good, however, if you leave yourself for others, you will just be ‘another’ among the ocean of ‘all others!’
If you feel that you really struggle to set boundaries with your family, friends, partners, children, or any person close to you, Hypnosis can help you to navigate this situation and start to live a happier and easy life.
Book a free HOW TO LEAD A FULLER AND LIGHTER LIFE STRATEGY SESSION so we can get you moving in the right direction. Just click on my calendar LINK and let’s book a time together so you can get started today!
Soothe Your Soul Meditation
March 30, 2023| 7–8pm ET
Sainoor is offering free ‘Soothe your Soul ’ meditation sessions on the last Thursday of each month.
When: Last Thursday of each month ➡️ next one: Thursday, March 30
Time: 7 – 8 pm EST
Where: Online, via Zoom
The session format will be:
- 10 min. discussion at the beginning
- 30 min. guided meditation
- allotted time for discussion and sharing at the end
To be part of this peaceful evening and save your spot, please register using this link. Or, you are welcome to email Sainoor by replying to this email and she will add you to the list...
Sainoor Premji B.Sc, M.Sc (Holistic Nutrition), RNCP, MHt, Master Hypnotist, Akashic Reader, Holistic Nutritionist, Montessori School Teacher.
An expert in mind-body-spirit connection, Sainoor has traveled widely on her journey through life- the feedback she received most often from her clients is how wonderful it feels to be free of fear, doubts, and yo-yo dieting; how they now live their lives with hope and lightness.
“Thank you for the wisdom and guidance. Sometimes we need words from a stranger to show us what we didn’t want to see ourselves.”- T.C.
“This was a life-changing session. I feel a sense of calm I have never felt before! Thank you for helping me to release the demon of fear!”- E.A.